It’s probably not what you’re thinking… waiting for Santa to come when I was a little girl, my first dance with friends in 8th grade, or my first date, or even that first college party with my besties. Last night was one for the books, one where my heart was so incredibly full I actually began to cry… my heart exploded with so many feelings and emotions there was nowhere else for them to go except out, in the form of tears. Pete the Cat had never sounded as beautiful as it did being sung by my six-year-old at 8:30 at night to my three-year-old… “and I’m rockin’, in my school shoes!”.
This is the first time Fulton had ever snuck out of bed and made his way to his sister’s room. I could hear his not-so-quiet journey towards her room… his little feet running and the rustling sound that darn pull-up makes (yes, he is still wearing it), and him barging into her room and “whispering” loudly to see if she was still awake… but I sat silently, listening, because I wanted to see what would transpire. And boy am I so very glad I did! Listening to the two whispering and giggling was just the sweetest and then Chloe began reading stories to him… and I almost died, right then and there, from a heart bursting with love.
The day this happened had been a terrible day, I was suffering from a debilitating migraine that had started the day before and I just hadn’t been able to find any relief so I had gone to sleep right after putting the kids to bed around 7. As I lay there, wishing Christopher was beside me and quite frankly feeling a bit sorry for myself, I heard this secret meeting taking place and I was suddenly thankful for this migraine. Mainly because it gave me the opportunity for the house to be quiet with for everyone in bed right on time, for it not allowing me to fall into a deep sleep, and it not allowing me to immediately get up when I heard Fulton in her room to take him back to his bed.
Moments like these completely overshadow those other moments when motherhood is overwhelming, exhausting, and just outright hard. I believe these moments are true gifts from God, reminding us that our children are gifts from Him as well. They are not our possessions to do whatever with as we please… God has entrusted them to us to form them into kind, loving, responsible citizens and disciples… certainly a tall order and down-right frightening to be given all that responsibility as a parent. May God give me many of these moments because I am about the most imperfect mother there ever was… but my goodness do I relish in all these sweet, special times and give unending thanks to our Lord and Blessed Mother.
*update* Since this night, my children now want to have a “sleepover” every single night. After so much energy telling them “no”, I finally said they could have one on the weekend… this has resulted in them staying up past 10pm Friday night and 9pm Saturday night. It has also resulted in me having to go into Chloe’s room 347 times to tell them to stop ______ (fill in the blank with anything you can think of and I’m sure I said it). Do you know the result of a 6 & 3 year old going to bed 3 hours late two nights in a row?!? It’s not pretty people… it’s not adorable or heart-warming either. So I will continue to think about this memory of their first ever (sweet and innocent) sleepover and hope the heart bursting memories flood over the pen drawings they decided to draw on Chloe’s wall or soak up the terrible memory of Fulton getting the plunger, sticking it in the toilet, then putting it on Chloe’s face while trying to “sleep”.
With the fullest heart and most tired brain,